OldSoul.blog

I doubt that anyone would wish to be known as an unkind person.  And yet most of us, at some stage, will have found ourselves having unkind thoughts, maybe speaking unkind words, and perhaps even taking unkind actions.  Why?  I guess because we’re human, and sometimes, despite our deep desire to be kind and gentle, we react in ways that hurt other people and leave us feeling disappointed in ourselves.

How might we change this?  How might we do better?  Are there any strategies we can implement to promote our formation as kinder, gentler people?  This is a quest we pursue for the sake of our own wellbeing, and for the sake of the world, because the practice of kindness really does make a difference!

Check out this short video clip: Thursday Appointment  [2:25 min]

Do you know when I am at my least kind?  When I am driving!  It doesn’t take much for me to become irritated by the slow driver in the outside lane, or get annoyed when the car I’m waiting for turns left without indicating, or to mutter unkind words about the driver whose indecision causes me to miss the lights … … there are so many bad drivers on the road these days!

In my better moments I realise the futility of such irritation and unkindness.  My angst certainly doesn’t change the situation or the driving habits of the other person.  But, if I allow it to, it can change my mood, my disposition – and not for the better.  How might I allow that awareness to better inform my reactions, to help me make kindness a habit?

Life Vest Inside is a non-profit organisation ‘dedicated to inspiring, empowering and educating people of all backgrounds to lead a life of kindness.’  They maintain that the practice of kindness = a better life.  Scientific evidence, they say, demonstrates that experiencing and performing acts of kindness provides an increased sense of self-worth, and greater happiness and optimism (Luk quoted on Live Vest Inside website). Whichmeans that kindness improves the life experience of both the ‘doer’ and the recipient, and helps create a better world for everyone.

The story of the Good Samaritan (Luke 10:25-37) is perhaps the most familiar of the parables of Jesus.  It has legendary status not just among people of faith but in the secular world as well, where the label ‘Good Samaritan’ is often used to identify one who acts with kindness toward others.  I reckon this story points us to the core message of the life and teaching of Jesus.  I’m in no doubt that Jesus’ call to kindness is much more central to the gospel than the evangelistic ‘call-to-faith-in-Jesus’ that the Church has tended to make central.  To my mind, the gospel is about living the faith of Jesus – including the practice of kindness – and not about calling for faith in Jesus.

Any way you look at it, Jesus taught and modelled a priority for the practice of kindness.

And the practice of kindness is good for the soul! It makes us feel better about ourselves, bringing inner contentment and increased self-esteem.  As a result, we feel more secure, less defensive, less reactive, and begin to live with openness and generosity.  So, living with kindness is a win-win situation: we are being kind to ourselves even as we are being kind to others.

Additionally, the practice of kindness helps build respect for others. Being kind to another person inevitably creates a bond of mutual trust and respect.  A relationship is built that transcends differences. Even just one act of kindness promotes harmony in the world, modelling peace in place of conflict, love in place of hatred, hope in place of fear, and generosity in place of mistrust.

How, then, can I build the capacity for kindness in myself and others?

It’s easy!  Try this little experiment:

1. Perform random acts of kindness: open the door for someone, greet passers-by with a smile or a good morning, pick up a piece of rubbish, offer to carry someone’s shopping, let someone into a traffic queue or a coffee queue, pay for the next person’s coffee, etc., etc..  When we act with kindness we will feel better about ourselves, we will develop the ‘kindness habit’, and we will encourage others to act with kindness in their lives.
2. Notice and express appreciation for the acts of kindness you see around you.  If you see someone acting kindly toward someone else, congratulate them or thank them.  That word of appreciation will encourage them to make kindness a regular practice.  And developing your own awareness to acts of kindness that are happening all around you will make you feel better about the world, and empower you to continue to cultivate kindness in your own life.

So simple really, but potentially life-changing and world-changing.  Why not give it a go?

Be kind.

David Brooker